Hello Everyone!
          I wanted to share a book that I wrote with you called "The Power of Words."  The Power of Words began as a poem that I wrote for domestic violence survivors and it ended up as a guide to bullying for educators and parents.  I wrote the poem from the heart, from personal experience and from the experiences of others. As an advocate for domestic and sexual violence I have heard many stories from survivors, and their stories all had a common denominator......verbal abuse.  We all agreed that verbal, psychological and emotional abuse were just as devastating as the physical abuse, actually worse.
          As stated in the poem, "The Power of Words can change a life, have an impact on our future, positive, or negative, or leave a suture" has a powerful meaning. I remember a time in my life when I was dating an abusive police officer where he had his buddies; fellow officers intimidate me, harass me and follow me. In addition to that, he spread horrible rumors about me, calling me names like "crazy and bi-polar." His fellow officers of coursed supported him in his campaign to destroy my reputation. His intention was to destroy my reputation before I reported the abuse, and it worked. This had a powerful impact on me for many years.  I became anxious, depressed and developed PTSD as a result of many years of his verbal, physical, and psychological abuse and tactics. If you don't know anything about being abused by a police officer then you might not understand or appreciate the plight of what victim’s experience.
           Consequently, what I experienced was not only bullying from the abuser/bully, but I was also experiencing bullying from a group, also known as gang bullying. This is a very common tactic in police abuse.  It’s an effective tactic since society and juries tend to believe sworn police officers over the average citizen.  They have the power to influence others, positive or negative,  as a result of the position they hold as police officers. Here is another excerpt from Chapter Three of The Power of Words: 
Pair-Bullying and Gang Bullying
          "In many cases, the bullying is not isolated to just the victim and the bully. The bully may verbally assault and insult the victim in front of others. This is an effective way for the bully to publically humiliate the victim. This often leads to Pair-bullying, or even gang bullying. Pair-bullying is when a friend of the bully and the bully team up and bully together to reinforce intimidation and fear.   Gang-bullying is similar to Pair-bullying; except the bullying reaches further than only two individuals participating in bullying acts and behavior. Gang-bullying further reinforces power, fear, and intimidation on the victim.” I am sharing my personal story in hopes that others will reach out and talk about their experience and to bring awareness to this very sensitive topic to end bullying. Domestic violence is a form of bullying, but all grown up.
          I began to wonder how bullies became who they were and of course there was no black and white answer to it.  What I found is that there are multiple variables that make up a bully. Their overall biopsychosocial makeup, in addition to their environment, among other factors had an influence on whether or not a person became a bully. Environment being at the forefront since bullying is a learned behavior. 
           The Power of Words is a poem that was created to bring awareness to bullying, domestic violence, and suicide prevention.  Research confirms that bullying can affect the overall health, emotional well-being and academic performance of victims.  Individuals who are bullied are more likely than their peers to have lower self-esteem, higher rates of depression and anxiety, report they feel ill on a regular basis, have more frequent thoughts of suicide and absenteeism from school, abuse substance as a means to cope, and the potential for developing Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).  
           Bullying prevention should be woven into the fabric of school life as early as pre-school. This can begin as early as 18 months or during the time when parents and caregivers are teaching their child to respect people; learning right from wrong, and teaching them that hitting and name calling hurts and is not acceptable. By enforcing anti-bullying campaigns we are educating our youth and providing them with useful tools to utilize if they find themselves in a bullying situation.
           A proactive approach to bullying will benefit our youth, their families, and the community. If parents begin to teach their children at an early age, in addition to preschool teachers, elementary, junior and high school teachers teaching the same message, in addition to continuing the anti-bullying message to children throughout their lifetime, we can change bullying on a continuum of a lifetime.  Anti-bullying prevention will promote an environment for learning and will protect others from this cruel act.  Additionally, we will see a decline in domestic violence and other crimes as a result of early education and prevention management.
          A bullying prevention program will help our youth in building healthy peer relationships; excel in their studies and in reaching their optimal potential; Self-esteems will bolster, there will be less anxiety and depression and ultimately a reduction in the rates of suicide.  It is paramount that both victim and bully receive interventions. Although prevention is always key; for some prevention is too late. The victim may already have the lifelong effects that bullying produced.  Victimized children need to be reached, and they need to have someone to reach out to. An intervention program will give our children a way to reach out for help if they need it.  The Power of Words is a guide for both parents and educators on the topic of bullying as it relates to our youth.

ENJOY!

 

Victoria